Are you enabling someone?

I don’t know how I’m getting these random ideas for blog posts lately, probably because I am quarantined in my house with my own thoughts running wild. Today’s topic is enablers.

There are many different kind of enablers. What is an enabler you ask?

An enabler is someone who is not helping a situation. It’s someone who is allowing the bad things/actions to continue. Here are some examples:

1. You find out that your grown ass kid whom is living in your house is on drugs. You see them going downhill and doing absolutely nothing positive for their life. They get to the point where they are overdosing, lying and stealing. This is the point where you need to take action and kick them out of your house. If you don’t, all you’re doing is giving them a roof to where they can do their drugs and take advantage of you underneath it. You’re an enabler.

2. You go to the doctor’s with your significant other and the doctor tells them that they are overweight and very unhealthy and it can become life-threatening if they do not change their ways, but you’re enabling them by not helping them get on the right track. You’re enabling them by going out and getting them fattening food. You’re enabling them if you’re telling them that they are beautiful the way that they are. You’re an enabler.

3. So you find yourself in a relationship with someone who is very toxic for you. They are verbally, mentally and emotionally and physically abusive, but you stay. You don’t tell anyone the truth about what’s really going on, and you stay with them. You’re enabling their behavior by not standing up to them and getting yourself out of that toxic situation. You’re making them think that it’s okay for them to treat you like you’re trash.

Tough love and ultimatums

Being in any one of these situations is hard, I know, trust me, but you’re not doing them any favors by enabling their behavior and their ways of living and you’re definitely not doing yourself any favors by doing that either. Tough love and ultimatums people, that’s what we need to do. Whatever they choose to do after is their decision, and you should not feel bad in any way.

This is my two cents for the day.